In Uncategorized on November 4, 2013 at 4:47 pm


So that’s Mayhem Film Festival over for another year. This time around I made it to three of the four days (unfortunately I missed out on Saturday due to preparations for our event as ‘Hello Gore’ – more on that shortly) and could easily have stayed for another three. Highlights were certainly ‘Delivery’, ‘Big Bad Wolves’, ‘Wake in Fright’ and, of course, ‘Don’t Look Now’ in Nottingham’s St Mary’s Church with Nicolas Roeg Q&A.

As we did last year, here are a summary of our tweets – this time from the @CineDiab page.

This year’s hashtag is . Expect pithy reports all weekend from us.

By us, I mean . We run this Twitter page if you hadn’t already noticed the snarky tone.

Bow. Bow bow bow bow bowww.

I’ve just devoured a dirty chicken meal while sat in a steamed up Skoda Fabia. More disturbing than any film this festival.

Brian Netto seems to be the sweetest man to have ever made me create a little sick in my mouth.

In hindsight, the sick might be the chicken…

…or all the actors with face-lifts during that film.

Statistics so far. Three cock shots. Four men of the cloth. Three bleeding groins. Three pregnancies. Countless disco classics.

It’s still going on at

Back at today after a day release. I hear I missed a cracking day.

Things I have learnt today at . Don’t go to Australia. Don’t admit genetic irregularities. Don’t go to Ireland.

Note to self: Cancel whimsical limb surgery.

was really great. They should do it every year, but perhaps change the hashtag to


Throughout the whole weekend though, I was thinking about how it could be improved for 2014. Here are some tips and advice for Chris and Steve (no need to thank me):

1. Now that the festival has been promoted to Screen 1, there is an opportunity to turn all seats into reclining beds, as no one actually moves from their own seats for the whole weekend. During each introduction to the films, either Chris or Steve can pull a special lever to the right of the screen that automatically reclines and stands the backs of the seats when required.

2. Mayhem branded black leather gloves.

3. More food/horror based puns for the Broadway Cinema food menu. Examples such as Suspiri-piri-chicken, Zombie Flesh Fajitas, The Hills Have Pies, Stanley Kubrisket, Lamb Chopping Mall, Dario Argentoad-in-the-hole, Stephen King’s Curry, Peeping Tomato-Soup, The Meatballs Under The Stairs, Children of the Corn-on-a-Cob, Freaks Salad, Mario Baklava, John Carpenter’s Toasts of Mars, Roger Korman, David Cronenburger. Again guys, you’re welcome.

For more information on Mayhem, visit


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